Saturday, December 31, 2016
Wednesday, December 28, 2016
Tuesday, December 27, 2016
Sunday, December 11, 2016
Saturday, December 10, 2016
Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse, 2015 - ★★
Not a great horror comedy. Not a totally shitty one. Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse is just there.
We had normal people fighting Zombies. We had Abraham Lincoln fighting Zombies. We have Brad Pitt fighting Zombies. Let's have a group of Scouts fight Zombies.
It actually sounds like a great idea. Scouts, trained for survival outside, in extreme situations since they were little kids. I hoped we would get a movie about a group of skilled teenagers surviving the Apocalypse by being smart and resourceful.
Instead we get the typical teenagers trying to get laid story we got in every teen movie since American Pie, with probably more influences from Superbad.
It had some redeeming moments, there are some fun scenes every now and then (killing a Zombie by putting a split bottle in their head and having the blood pour out of the bottleneck was actually pretty funny), but all in all it just feels very old, rehashing what we saw a million times before.
All in all it really isn't something I'd tell people to watch to have a fun time. Maybe some might get something out of this movie, but for the most part, it just isn't any good.
I'm rating this movie 2 out of 5 stars.
Also I now want a movie with the Scouts from Team Fortress fighting Zombies. Please?
Reservoir Dogs, 1992
After watching Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping with a big group of friends we found out that more than half of us hadn't seen Reservoir Dogs yet. So we watched this. With a German dub...
Everyone knows RD is a great movie, and an exceptional first movie for an exceptional filmmaker. So I decided to use this movie to talk about dubs.
Because I live in Germany and most of our population speaks German, Germans were raised with watching all movies dubbed. Every movie from America, every TV-Show, everything not in German is translated and dubbed.
That's great growing up. As a kid you can watch everything, don't need to be able to read or know another language.
But you also get used to the dubs.
I stopped watching dubbed versions probably a year ago, now I only watch them if I really have to. And soon I started to realize how shit most dubs are. Especially older dubs.
So just having seen Reservoir Dogs in German (because the English is hard to understand and subtitles are distracting ... ) I wanna list why dubs suck.
In the 90s, many voice actors were not as good in saying English names, so when someone mentions Joey, it just sounds horrible.
As you might now, most of this movie is set in a warehouse, with some scenes in a big bathroom. As you all know, in these kinds of rooms there is some sort of reverb on the voice. Since they don't record the dub in a warehouse or a bathroom they put the reverb on it afterwards. And I feel like even I could make a better effort at making it sound real.
Of course, Tarantino is known for his great dialogues, and for getting great acting out of his actors.
Here, someone else is directing the voice acting, so like in many other cases, you can't really judge a dubbed movie by the acting because the voice is very important to acting. And instead of the dialogue sounding real and true, it sounds really weird because no one talks like that here. Because English people talk different than German people, so many things are lost in translation or are translated in a way that it doesn't sound real. I've never heard anyone talk the way they talk in this movie.
Also, everything, not only voices, but also walking and just every part of the sound just sounds ... off. It sounds like it's all been recorded in a studio... because it has been.
All in all, dubs are really bad once you stopped seeing them regularly. Suddenly, everything sounds shit. Luckily in recent years, dubs got better and better, so by now it is bearable to go to the cinema, I don't have to search for the original version-screenings, I can still enjoy recent movies without having to barf.
I just had to get this all off my chest, thank you for reading through.
Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping, 2016 - ★★★★½
I watched this how you are supposed to watch it: With a group of friends, some who know the Lonely Island, some who only know a few of their songs.
And we all had a great time.
I'll start off writing about the music. We get quite a few really catchy songs. And all were just like Lonely Island songs, that also feel original.
This movie is filled of cameos, not only from musicians, but also just big stars and even some actors. And Justin Timberlake, who is all 3.
It started of really funny, we all couldn't stop laughing. After a while it got a bit less funny, much less jokes per minute, because they actually managed to get some story in there.
The story was okay, of course you knew what was going to happen, but hey, who cares about predictability in a comedy documentary by the Lonely Island.
I really had a fun time watching this, one of the funniest movies I've seen this year. I'm rating this movie 4.5 out of 5 stars and giving it a big like and recommend. If you like the lonely island, you are gonna love this.
Krampus, 2015 - ★★★★
'tis the season.
After watching Trick'r'Treat for Halloween and really liking it, I decided to check out Michael Dougherty's next Holiday movie.
When I first heard about this I thought it would be a straight up horror. But by now I expected comedy, black comedy, with many scary elements.
And that's what I got. A fun story, interesting characters, and still lots of darkness.
The acting was good, even by the children.
What I loved the most were the monsters, sometimes CGI that was not as convincing, but mostly the practical beings. They looked awesome and really scary.
As always I gotta give a shout-out to a movie casting a real German actress as a German, talking real German.
I had a fun time with this movie and I'm rating it 4 out of 5 stars and a like.
Wednesday, December 7, 2016
Man vs. Snake, 2015 - ★★★★
"What is the best part of the cereal in the morning? Drinking the milk after, right? Everybody loves the milk...
So why not just make cereal milk . Make it taste like fruit loops or something."
Best and most relevant quote ever put to film.
Duran Duran: Unstaged, 2014
I watched it yesterday and after it was over I went to sleep. I then had the most surreal and crazy dream in months. I'll just credit that to David Lynch.
Sunday, December 4, 2016
Meet the Spartans, 2008 - ★
Yeah, it was as bad as I expected. Don't watch it. It hurts. They don't even try anymore. It is en par with Starving Games in my opinion, and I hated that movie. Guess that means I have to rate it 1 star, just because again, no eye cancer.
Child's Play 2, 1990 - ★★★½
I feel someone should be able to recut this movie into an evil child movie. The omen 4.5 or something like that.
Maybe it is because I don't remember the first movie all that much, but I really felt like this was a step up, superior to the original movie.
Of course you can't count much on acting, especially child acting, in these kind of movies. You look for the story, fun and the gore. And, especially in a Killer-Puppet-Movie the special effects.
Story: As in every sequel ever, of course the evil being comes back and is now on his way to get the survivor of the original movie. Other than the kid the whole cast is new. Mother is in a psychiatric facility, and there wasn't much else. The story is well paced, there is not much downtime between kills, we get some nice character building for the new characters, mostly the new "Big Sister".
Fun: With such a crazy premise, you'd have to go out of your way to not make it fun. Just imagine a crazy little doll with red hair and freckles kills everyone in his way. And speaks with a deep voice, and speaks mostly in obscenities. Pair that with lots of forgettable, easily killable grown ups and you got yourself a lot of fun.
Gore: For a movie with a little boy in the lead, Child's Play 2 has a lot of gore. It's not Tom Savini levels or numbers of gore, but there are quite a few standout scenes. That toy factory is literally full of killing machines.
Effects: I remember the original Child's Play Chucky doll being alright. Usually it was just the puppet, maybe some slight movement, but nothing too crazy. Here, Chucky is really well made, lots of facial expressions, mouth movements etc. I sometimes even forgot how much work was behind this and just thought well that's just really Chucky. I really believed in the puppets performance.
All in all, it hit all the right marks and managed to be fun even though it's a sequel. It doesn't do anything completely new, but it does all the things right to make you enjoy it without being bored.
I'm rating Child's Play Two 3.5 out of 5 stars and a like.
(While writing this review more than once I had my fingers on the wrong keys and wrote Child's Okay so just imagine me putting a witty joke about that right here. Thanks)
Last 10 Top 10 #39 of 2016
In this Last 10 Top 10 I liked every movie, even my #10, the Beatles A Hard Days Night, is a fun movie and I enjoyed it, just less than everything else. I loved the Top 6, they were all movies I am sure I will revisit sooner or later.
Disclaimer: AVGN is probably higher up for me because I love James Rolfe and just really really love his stuff.
Saturday, December 3, 2016
Metalhead, 2013 - ★★★★
Found this randomly on Netflix. Expected a metal comedy, maybe somehow similar to deathgasm.
What I got was a beautiful coming of age story about a girl whose brother dies in a tractor accident. So she gets into his favorite music: Metal. It still got some funny scenes, but never laugh out loud.
The acting is great, especially Thora Bjorg Helga, who plays the main girl and really got me invested.
I'm not big into metal but I can appreciate good music and I feel like the songs were well chosen.
I'm rating this movie 4 out of 5 stars and a like.
Friday, December 2, 2016
Saturday, November 26, 2016
Triangle, 2009 - ★★★★½ (contains spoilers)
This review may contain spoilers.
Heard a lot about this movie yet managed to not know much about it (mostly because everyone just recommended it with the words "I won't spoil it, just watch it. And so I did.
Triangle is one of the few smart time travel movies that don't end in a paradox. Lots of times I was reminded of Timecrimes, a Spanish time travel movie made 2 years earlier. And I feel pretty certain this got at least some inspiration from that movie.
The acting was good, but this is really about the story. The movie manages to wrap you up and not let you go for 99 minutes straight. Even if you can guess some parts (maybe because of similarities to timecrimes) you'll still get new things out of it, you still wanna know what is happening.
The main character makes some stupid choices that I can't quite wrap my head around, or maybe understood it wrong myself, but in the end it doesn't matter. Characters maks stupid choices, but as long as the movie is still fulfilling you in the end it is all good.
And this movie certainly did.
I'm rating Triangle 4.5 out of 5 stars and a big like and recommend.
Der Theaterbesuch, 1934
Really funny, reminded me so much of my grandparents that I actually had to show it to them. They liked it too.
Tuesday, November 22, 2016
Saturday, November 19, 2016
Friday, November 18, 2016
I Am the Pretty Thing That Lives in the House, 2016 - ★★★★
I have no idea what happened in this movie. But I loved it.
I am the pretty thing that lives in the house is a slow burn ghost story about a easily scared nurse taking care of an elderly horror writer.
Every single scene of this movie was beautiful. Just visually alone this was a masterpiece. Some scenes looked straight out of a video game (a horror game of course), others looked like one of those creepy old paintings your grandma has in her attic.
From the very first second I was caught and scared. It always just feels off, just a little bit. And as the movie goes on everything get's weirder, scarier and creepier, the angles, the zooms, the music.
Sound editing was great. There were lots of silent scenes, with just the background sounds. And they were super intriguing.
The biggest part is the story though. Maybe I'm wrong here, but I think this movie is made to give birth to theories and discussion. But, unlike in some other movies like this, I feel like there is a right answer. If you analyze every scene in this movie, in the end they will make sense somehow. So right now I'm waiting for someone to do exactly that and then explain it to me.
All in all I really enjoyed this movie a lot. I was creeped out throughout, there were no annyoing jump scares, and everything felt deserved. I'm rating this movie 4 out of 5 stars and a like.
Thursday, November 17, 2016
Top 10 movies of 2016
Disclaimer: Only watched 20 movies from 2016 so far, so there are some not so good ones in here.
Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, 2016 - ★★★½
A new installment in the Harry Potter Franchise. I haven't even seen Harry Potter 7 and 7.2, but luckily, this is set long before that, in America and is actually it's own story (with some casual namedrops on the way).
I really didn't know anything about this movie other than Eddie Redmayne being in it, and I think that helped my enjoyment. I'm really happy that for once we get to follow powerful wizards and don't have to see people learning how to magic.
I watched the German dubbed version in cinema, so I can't say that much about the acting (I heard Colin Farrell does an American accent?), but one character stood really out to me, especially because I didn't recognize the face at all. It was Credence, a boy living with his anti-magic mother. He is played by Ezra Miller, who was great in everything I've seen him in, and in this he blew it out of the park. I did not realize it was him until I read the credits. But also I can't say anyone was standout bad.
That being said, most characters were very flat, one-dimensional. I think they tried having one character shockingly turn to the dark side, but it was telegraphed, I knew it basically right away.
To be honest, most of this movie was predictable. And not in the "of course you know the good guy is going to win" kind of way. But there are more than one scene that I knew how it would end the minute it started.
The visuals were great. Let's be real, we're now at a point with CGI where these movies become even more fun, they can make every fantastic beast we can imagine. The title is half true. We get to see a lot of fantastic beasts, but only for a few we get a rough area where we can find them. The beasts were looking awesome, and were pretty inventive.
My cinema only showed this movie in 3D and it is one of the annoying 3D movies. There are many scenes that took me out of the movie, because they had those little bug things fly up to you and look you right in the face. I'm still waiting for that trope to die out. 3D should be used subtle and as an enhancement, but this is one of the occasions where the movie will be even more annoying when watched in 2D, because then you get these scenes just in there for the cool 3D effect, but without the cool 3D effect.
Even though I just spent a few paragraphs bashing the movie I still enjoyed it. I had a great time in the cinema, the visuals were amazing in 3D, and I really enjoy that they expand on the universe. Like I said in the beginning, I really like getting to explore this universe with a experienced magician now instead of a young boy never leaving London and never using any magic. I'm rating this movie 3.5 out of 5 stars and a like. If you like the Harry Potter universe, you will like this movie.
Big Hero 6, 2014 - ★★★★
I didn't even know that this was a Superhero movie before I watched it, but now it's one of my favorite superhero movies for sure. It's a great origin story with fun characters and a good villain. Recommend.
Friday, November 11, 2016
The True Memoirs of an International Assassin, 2016 - ★★★
A comedy starring Kevin James usually isn't something I'm interested in. But then I saw the trailer that netflix shoved down my throat and I decided "why not".
I gotta say I was positively surprised.
Especially the beginning was really fun, great action sequences, intercut with James wondering how to write the story. The action was shot well, I somehow actually believed James could pull this off.
It lost me storywise when his character was kidnapped by terrorists who believed he was the real deal. Everything happening afterwards just feels unrelistic. I also don't really like stories about normal people being mistaken for someone else and then having to do that job.
But if we suspend our disbelief for that whole part it was still fun. I liked that they incoporated his research and actual training so that it looks at least a bit more realistic. It's kind of like the Da Vinci Code in that regard.
The comedy is alright. It was not one where they throw jokes into your face until you give up, it wasn't as much comedy as I expected. And I'm really happy there were no Kevin James slapstik moments, but he actually felt like a competent human being.
All in all while this is not a masterpiece it surely is watchable. It's something to watch on the side, or maybe to come down after watching an Ingmar Bergman marathon. I'm rating True Memoirs of an International Assassin 3 out of 5 stars.